I thought I knew, but too bad I doesn't know.

From single to double life,

After so long and I thought I knew how to love a person even better,

Yet today I realize I was wrong,

The truth is I doesn't know how to love a person,

Despite all these years being alone.

I was under depression mode,

Just feels like life is fucking idiot when everything jumbled up,

And worst knowing nothing much I can do about it,

That's even fucking disappointing..not to anyone but myself.

Those trouble happened on past till now,

And then added on stress towards my career path,

Including those frustration I had towards people and things around me,

Damn I am confirm dead.

So I am having low mood like usual,

But one thing totally different is I am having you beside me,

Yet I had allowed the emotion took every little positive energy in me,

And eventually I am hurting someone I care so much and some people around me,

With all idiotic coldness and worst, bad manner.

I wish I could make things better now,
But I don't know what I should do,

Because truly speaking I am still learning how to live from single to double,

I am totally imperfect person to have someone as good as you beside me,

The only thing I knew I am lucky enough.

I wish you were here...right here, where I can hug you and letting you know I doesn't mean so much on every little I had pour towards you. I am just being too emotional and well, I just too care when knew something that I thought we could shared at the firsthand. I am sorry, my dear. Please forgive me and let me takes my time to learn being the owner of my emotion. I just know, the now me missing you badly and hoping you are fine.